It was time for the interrogation of the suspects in my house.

Suspects; My Hobbit-like wife, Sheila and the dookie licking daughter, Lacy.

I had searched almost an hour for the bacon that I had bought the day before and stashed in the crisper drawer of our refrigerator.

It was Farmland’s Hickory Smoked Bacon with low sodium.

It was nowhere to be found.

I tore that fridge apart!

I even looked under the lettuce for god sakes!

I even checked the receipt from the grocery store to make sure I hadn’t imagined it…

I am almost 50 years old, after-all…I….forget stuff……sometimes…..a little.

I didn’t remember waking during the night and experiencing a pseudo-sexual bacon feeding frenzy.

I thought about it for a second….

If anyone knows, I know….that anything can happen @ 2 am in a dark kitchen, bathed in the low glow of light from the fridge.

No, that…